I’ve been struggling with something for a while now, and it’s not easy to admit. I’ve been dealing with porn addiction... and yeah, I said it.
It started out so casually, you know? Just a quick search here and there, nothing crazy. I mean, it’s everywhere, right? Everyone talks about it, so I thought it was normal. But over time, I noticed it was becoming more... constant. It wasn’t just something I did when I was bored or stressed; it started to become something I needed to do, even when I didn’t want to.
I’d get home from work or school, and instead of just relaxing or doing something productive, I’d end up scrolling for hours. I’d try to stop, but then my mind would start racing, and I’d feel like I had to. Like, if I didn’t, I’d be restless, or just... off. I started to feel so disconnected from everything else, like I couldn’t focus on anything. It’s honestly exhausting.
And it’s not just about the time I waste. It’s... it’s how it’s made me feel about myself. Like, I don’t even look at people the same way anymore, you know? It’s like I’ve disconnected from real, genuine connections because my brain is so used to this instant gratification. When I try to talk to someone or be real with them, I just feel... empty. Like I’m not really present.
It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even recognize who I am anymore. I’ve tried to cut back, but the urge is so strong. And it makes me feel so ashamed because... I know it’s not healthy. But every time I try to break free, I fall back into it. It’s like this vicious cycle, and it’s hard to explain to anyone who hasn’t been there.
I mean, I’ve tried talking to friends about it, but it’s so embarrassing. Like, how do you even bring that up? ‘Hey, by the way, I’m addicted to porn.’ It feels like such a taboo, and I’m scared of being judged. But it’s also the loneliness that comes with it. It’s like I’m living in this world where I’m constantly reaching for something that makes me feel... something, even if it’s not real. And it’s messing with my head.
I guess I’m sharing this because... I don’t know, maybe someone else out there can relate. Maybe someone else is struggling with this, too, and doesn’t know how to talk about it. I don’t have all the answers. Honestly, I don’t know how to fix this yet. But I’m trying. And maybe that’s all I can do for now — just keep trying."
I’ve been struggling with something for a while now, and it’s not easy to admit. I’ve been dealing with porn addiction... and yeah, I said it.
It started out so casually, you know? Just a quick search here and there, nothing crazy. I mean, it’s everywhere, right? Everyone talks about it, so I thought it was normal. But over time, I noticed it was becoming more... constant. It wasn’t just something I did when I was bored or stressed; it started to become something I needed to do, even when I didn’t want to.
I’d get home from work or school, and instead of just relaxing or doing something productive, I’d end up scrolling for hours. I’d try to stop, but then my mind would start racing, and I’d feel like I had to. Like, if I didn’t, I’d be restless, or just... off. I started to feel so disconnected from everything else, like I couldn’t focus on anything. It’s honestly exhausting.
And it’s not just about the time I waste. It’s... it’s how it’s made me feel about myself. Like, I don’t even look at people the same way anymore, you know? It’s like I’ve disconnected from real, genuine connections because my brain is so used to this instant gratification. When I try to talk to someone or be real with them, I just feel... empty. Like I’m not really present.
It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even recognize who I am anymore. I’ve tried to cut back, but the urge is so strong. And it makes me feel so ashamed because... I know it’s not healthy. But every time I try to break free, I fall back into it. It’s like this vicious cycle, and it’s hard to explain to anyone who hasn’t been there.
I mean, I’ve tried talking to friends about it, but it’s so embarrassing. Like, how do you even bring that up? ‘Hey, by the way, I’m addicted to porn.’ It feels like such a taboo, and I’m scared of being judged. But it’s also the loneliness that comes with it. It’s like I’m living in this world where I’m constantly reaching for something that makes me feel... something, even if it’s not real. And it’s messing with my head.
I guess I’m sharing this because... I don’t know, maybe someone else out there can relate. Maybe someone else is struggling with this, too, and doesn’t know how to talk about it. I don’t have all the answers. Honestly, I don’t know how to fix this yet. But I’m trying. And maybe that’s all I can do for now — just keep trying."